Do all moms of infants routinely praise their children for every bodily function? Because my baby does not burp or fart without my lauding her accomplishment. Also, her snoring? Freaking adorable.
At some point, though, it's all going to change. I can just picture her as a high school sophomore.
Me: "You got a C in Algebra II?! Unacceptable."
Her: "Mom, come on. You used to think I shat rainbows and farted daisies, fer chrissake. WTF happened?"
Me: "Don't cuss around your mother. And you were a hell of a lot cuter then. Also, you gave me exponentially more heart-melting 'I love you' looks. Plus, you weren't in school yet. And you had these little, tiny, perfect fingernails... quit trying to change the subject. This grade had better improve by your next report card, young lady."
Her: "Oh yeah? What grade did you get in Algebra II?"
Me: "That is entirely beside the point."
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